month 50

And so, we continue with the month of "why's". You are really trying to figure out the world and it's fun to watch the connections you make. For example, you call Seth "my 3 year-old with a Mohawk."

photo by Amy Hummel

I mean, duh, right? But it's just cool to me to see that that's how you categorize Seth. He's in that 3 year-old file under "Mohawk".

Talking to you long ago became just like talking to a little adult. You use large words in proper context with perfect enunciation. It's really fun, therefore, to hear you put two and two together. One of your favorite shows is "Survivor man" about this guy who goes to some crazy place for a week and has to live as if he were stranded. In one that you saw recently he was trying to survive in the frozen arctic and he had to carry a gun because of the polar bears. While you thought it was really cool that he could have a gun, it took you a minute to realize why he had a gun. Because, I mean, why would he need to shoot a gentle, defenseless polar bear? You kept asking, "why would the polar bears hurt him?" or "Are polar bears mean?" and you were really confused because one day in the recent past after about 45 polar bear-related questions I finally just said what you wanted to hear about them...which was that they are all kind and gentle and wouldn't hurt anyone.

I realize now that in shielding you from the truth I've only made the truth harder to hear. I promise to be more patient with you...so you don't have to hear the truth from Survivor Man.

So you can imagine my panic when after our scripture time you asked, "Is God the one who holds the earth up?" I said, "well, God made the earth so that it would stay up in the sky all on it's own."

To which you replied, "How did he make it? Did he use tape?"

And so Dad jumped in for the interception,

"I think it was more of a glue thing."

Since Dad's covering the sciences and theology, your Grandma Cuckoo (Bracken) is covering the arts. The other day you drew this picture: and said, "I'm drawing Starry Starry Night"

and I said, "Oh, by Vincent Van Gogh?"

and you said, "like the one that Grandma Cuckoo taught me about."

Go Grandma Cuckoo!

If I could use just two words to describe your life right now they would be "making connections". It's like your brain is just shifting all of this information around until it fits into some kind of category. You love information books. We have one about bugs that we read to you quite a bit, and you always ask really good questions, but I never know the answers. I always have to read the page until I find the answer embedded in the tiny print. I keep thinking you'll get bored watching me research your question, but you never do. You just sit there patiently. As if knowing the answer to "How do beetles protect themselves" is the meaning of life, and you'll just sit and wait, thank you very much.

But the truth is, I know why you like me to spend so much time finding answers for you. It's not so much about the answers I'm going to find, but the effort I'm putting in to finding them. This is sobering to admit, but I think you just crave time with Dad and me. No matter how it is spent, and I'm sure you don't even realize it. There is no doubt in my mind that it's important to you to know the name of a specific wasp, but I also know that you won't remember it.

What you WILL remember is that I sat down with you and read a book; that we sought out an answer to a question together, and that you were snuggled in my arms.

And I hope you remember that I loved every minute of it.